Second experience summer 2014

The Second situation was a little bit more stressful. In the summer camp with the kids, there was a kind of rebellion against us within a group because they felt we were unfair with them because of something that happened some weeks before the camp started. So, there came a point where we get to know they were planning to do some tricky things to us as a revenge for that unfairness. We got to know before it was done and we proved them they were to do it. We took them all out of their shelters and we asked them about it all. They pretended there was nothing about it, but we showed them we knew about it. We talked a lot about the meaning of trust, about how disapointed we were, and about the possible solution to the situation. Actually we agreed on giving them some 20 minutes to talk among themselves and try to reach a solution. We left them speaking, discussing and in a way, some quarreling but always in a peaceful way. After the  minutes, we came back to them and asked them for the solution they see to solve the problem. There was not a convincing proposal and we told them that we, the teachers, the youth leaders, felt as if they were cheating on us, which was kind of true. We told them to start packing because we decided they had to go back home, we were to phone their families the very next day to come and pick them up. But we did not mean that to happen, we wanted them to really confront the true possible consequence of a group action they were involved in with a non real solution to it. As we knew were reach another solution the very next day, because we did not mean to have them back to their homes, we requested all the cellphones so that they could not talk to their families before we did. They accepted, all of them, but one: Rebeca. As a teacher, it is not good to have a favourite student. But I always have one, the point is that I tried not to make them know about it. Rebeca was this one for me. I know her since she was 9 years old, she was 13 last summer. Her personal situation was and is that unthinkable one that makes her being the most mature girl in the whole world. Rebeca refused to give her cellphone, nobody could ever take her cellphone from her unless she lets you do it. I was some meters away and Monica called me: Ceci, Rebeca does not want to give us her cellphone, Talk to her, please." I felt such a big big pressure on my shoulder and my head, because I know her. So Rebeca and I went away, I started to talk to her, asked her about her studies and bla bla bla... She suddendly, with such a serious face, turned to me and asked me: Are you doing this all because you are trying to convince me to give you the phone? Shit, that was amazingly smart. Then  I told her she was right, sure. I was honest to her, what the fuck. I started to explain to her how I felt about this all and the fact that she was such a mature person compare to all the rest of the boys and girls over there. Then, all of a sudden, I recover Anas´ words about the man in the desert, and I told her the meaning of trust. She stared at me like saying with her eyes  " bla bla bla shit about trust, good". I stopped and told her like this: "Trust has to do with giving and not demanding. Trust has to do with being the first one to do and express the meaning of trust to me. So Rebeca, I am not to ask for the phone. Not even to me. You just go, and do what you think you have to do according to yourself. Whether it be your decision about the cellphone, I will accept it, because I know you, I trust you and I know you will have your reasons to whatever your decision is". Damn it , she turned around, with tears in her eyes, not in mine yet, being really strong and coherent the girl, I turned around and after 1 minute I started to cry so much. Damn it. After a while, we have the meeting with all the teachers over there. Monica told me that Rebeca came to her, kissed her and gave her the cellphone. The very next day, we had another meeting with the kids, and we agreed on doing a concrete activity so that they showed they learnt about this all. Rebeca looked happy,happier than any of the other kids around. I felt really happy about it all, as well. 
I don´t know what her life will be, what I can do about it, maybe nothing. But I know one thing: at least, I showed that whenever she wants, I´ll be there, that I am not going to judge her for what she does or what she is. That there is always a way out, always.

Spanish version of this, later on ... by now, only english comes to my mind even when recovering this movie in my head which was in spanish, I found how to express the same feeling I had in english. I feel so happy inside that I can even see it in the photos. So glad to meet me again, so happy to have found me again. So strong again, nothing can stop me now. I feel so full of energy ...