What counts ...

After a week in Amman, dealing with gender issues, gender inequality ... thanks Mun for today. 

Gender Matters, thanks to the fact that I am a lesbian, well, the "lesbian" tag that many people uses to define me, to understand me or just to make it esier for then to make up with an ideal image of me, the idea behind that tag has helped me a lot to understand the genderized world we live in and how gender matters. In a way, it helps me to understand and address to many issues from a different point of view, and in another way, it is a curse for me because of the mental place the tag takes me to by many people out there. It is that I do fit everywhere, but it is also I do not fit at all. 

Being who I am proves me that to talk about gender equality is easier to be addressed to once you break the two hegemonic blocks: male and female, femenine and masculine, man and women roles. The moment I do not fit anywhere, I have to find a new world, a new word, a new role model, a new way of life, a new road to walk over, a new place to go, a new word to be defined by, a new utopia to follow. The moment many people starts realizing there is not just a single election composed by two options, a manifold road opens up for you. Then ... freedom is the rule and to be free an utopia to walk to. Then ... freedom becomes a gift and a curse at the same time, then to be able to cope with that feeling of "touching the sky and falling to the lowest emotional place in the world of feeling, has been the best thing that could have ever happened to me. It is then, when I found it, when I know the tattoo I want in my arm, with Arabic characters: Iván. He fulfilled an intense, full-sense process in me and pushed me to become the person I am not just for my self-fish sake, but for justice.

There was a time when I felt so bad because of the very thought of him, being kind of aware I was sad because of him that took my mind out of me. There was a time when I was struggling a lot to take it out of me. It is gone.

  

Once again, thanks Munta for being there and make me feel much better, for ... what I consider a true friend even in distance.